Let's Make A Toast Or Just Eat Some

A week ago today I was living a life

              so completely different than the one I have here at home.

After struggling through two semesters at Viterbo and being absolutely miserable, I found something. These past four weeks hold some of the best moments and feelings that I've ever had in my life. I believe in fate, I really do. I was meant to stumble upon the randomness that is Viterbo University in La Crosse, WI. I was meant to be placed at Spence Elementary School for field experience. I was meant to take the bus and see the Marcus Cinema every day. I was meant to take a shot in the dark and apply to the theater online. All of these tiny moments that seemed so meaningless at the time had to be strung together in order for me to have formed this life that I have now.

Pieces keep popping in my head. Listening to that Jason Derulo song at full blast in that red sunburn of a car. Going to the beach in dresses and without a swim suit. Listening to the boys point out each other's body issues.Watching Zach do ridiculous workouts in his basement. Wrestling with Patrick and losing.. every time. Hangin' at Chuck E. Cheese and realizing I'm still no good at those games. Going to pizza doctors and unexpectedly breaking news to Zach. Graduation parties of people I don't know and will probably never see again. Makin' toast for Patrick and myself. Calling the boys out on their most serious flaws regardless of how true they are and how much it might affect them. Cuddling together and knowing that soon they will leave the country. One after the other. And that I will go home, but almost refusing to believe the inevitable.

I often lie and tell people I miss them even though I really don't. I really did miss my parents when I was at school. I used to miss Ryan all the time when he was at Syracuse those first two years. So when I said to these few people that I missed them, I meant it. So yeah.. very few occasions when I said it and meant it.

So now here I am,
truly missing Zach and Patrick.

I know we haven't known each other for very long, but these guys mean a lot to me. I have never had friends anything like either of them before. My life will never be the same now that I know them boyz. I hope this isn't it for us. That would suck.

I can honestly say that if there was a time in my life that I could relive... these past few weeks would probably be it. They were so simple and sweet.

Everything felt so easy.